! megablog !

9/23/24
ah long time no blog eh? ive been a bit demotivated lately but im feelin it startin to come back now! ive been on pikidiary,,, its gotten me more used to bloggin ! my toki shrine has really been hard for me to code,, i scrapped my progress multiple times but i think i like how it is now,, i gotta make it perfect!!! pikidiary is really fun, the recent update is awesome!! ive learned a little bit of bbcode now! i love codinggggg!! and i love customization! i found more cool websites to follow on it! yayyyy ahh i gotta update my buttonzzz, so many arent there!! hopefully my motivation stays up! cant wait to code more,,,,

9/8/24
oh goshhhhhh guys , im getting more interested in selfshipping because i haave a specific character in mind,,,, and i just realized that i am the PERFECT age to ship with him,,,,,goshh im so giddy rn hes so cute i resonate so much with what ive been seeing,, ok ok its tokimitsu from bluelock hes 17 and im 16 like,,, that so perfecttttt ughhh i have this bad habit of feeling cringe but i dont wanna think like that!!! i must be kind to myself as i am to others,, i would never judge a selfshipper so why should i judge myself?? i shouldnt! wahhhh he makes me so happy but im scared to show my love for him fully,, i have weird headcannons abt him and i love analysing him. the weirdness comes from me relating to him and wanting him to be similar to me wahhhh im too weird. no im not!!!! ah idk what to think and any insight is welcome

9/1/24
I LOVE CODING!!!!! but sometimes i feel like i spend too much time on tha computer,,, i code 24/7 and im always on the puter, i love it so much but its not that good to be sitting all the time.. sighhhhh..i really wish to get a job that includes computers cuz mannnnn do i love em, gosh,,, i would never leave mah computer if i could. its so so so much fun and i receive so much for it. i get to have little friends on the internet, oh but ive actually made real friends recently!!!! they constantly want to see me and try to get together often so thats good for me. its hard to feel content tho,,, cuz if im not making art, no matter what i do i wont feel accomplished. but i keep trying to convince myself that coding IS art!!! it is!! thats why i love it so much! but i cant help but feel down when i dont draw,, sometimes i just dont feel like it,,,,, sigh,,,

8/30/24
i really like both scene and grunge i like to think im a mix of both, tho im a newbie when it comes to that stuff so far but im really interested in it,,,, gosh,, i love so many styles but those two really stick with me, i need to learn more abt them.. tho i do also love punk stuff too! how connfusing! but not really, i find it hard to stick with one and just live like that forever cuz im a mixture of everything i like so i think its unrealistic for me to identify with just one,, ah something i think is that i dont show my liking for grunge enough, i basically only show it by how i dress and even then it barely shows.. im just tryin to be as much of a weirdo as i can be honestly, i like feeling unpredictable i guess. and i like just being myself, but im too scared of being "cringe" unfortunately,,,, gotta change that

8/24/24
yea whats up, i needed to explain this cuz i now have a space to rant about stuff so im gonna friggin use it! this is further on the topic of my miniblog "i love when my faves turn out depressed" cuz i mean it geniunely, i LOVE being similar to my fave characters and when i find out they have a trait i have i go bonkers, so i get like giddy when they are all sad and stuff i love content of my faves no matter what kind GOD ok the character im actually referencing is aoyama from mha, he got so much more content made abt him when (spoilers) he was outed as the traitor and like AHHHHH i was so excited i loved him before cuz he was flamboyant but now hes secretly depressed????? hes so me!!!!! ugh i love him hes stuck in my head i love angst done well,,,, maybe i just kin him,, ahh that could be why,, i luv ppl that i relate to and am similar to sm!!!!! tldr: aoyama !!!!!!

8/23/24
whats up! first one! ill try to have stuff in here more than just saying how my day was n whatnot, try to keep my life interesting heh,, well i just figured out knowledge holds alot of power i think, ive been thinking of coding, my website and other ppls websites and i realize the potential everyone has to make something amazing. it just comes from knowledge, about coding and abt urself. but amazing is subjecting right? its hard to believe that i find,,, some sites just seem so,, well done,, im amazed at at all the different beautiful sites that i find,, i wish to believe my site is one of them aswell but its hard to think that. my relationship to my site is similar to how i view myself i think,,hmm i just gotta be myself, thats whats everyone else is doing. thats the "secret" to making a cool site, its just to be infinitely curious and infinitely urself. i think. lemme know if im wrong